Today I want to talk about a specific form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) known as Pedophilia OCD, or POCD. I won’t go into too much depth about the condition as I have already written about it here, but I want to talk about the psychological impact it has on those who experience it. Firstly, let’s briefly understand what OCD is. OCD is a mental health condition where you experience recurring, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) and engage in repetitive behaviours or mental acts (compulsions) to alleviate the distress these thoughts cause. OCD takes many forms, with people experiencing different types of obsessions, and for some of you, these obsessions are terrifying as the relate to paedophilia. If this resonates with you, and your unwanted thoughts are related to being afraid about being a paedophile, this is what we call Pedophilia obsessive compulsive disorder.
Before I go any further in the article I must state very clearly that having POCD does not mean you are a paedophile. If you haven’t already done so, I recommend reading some of my articles below for more educational material on the condition, as what you require at this stage as an understanding of how suffering created by this form of OCD, and what you can do to help yourself.
The debilitating nature of POCD means it can significantly impact daily life. These intrusive thoughts and compulsions can make it hard for individuals to carry out normal activities, leading to immense psychological suffering.
Psychological Impact
The psychological impact of POCD cannot be understated. I recently read an article on the International OCD Foundations website that spoke of the terrorizing anxiety of POCD, and I totally concur with that statement. I have been working with people with OCD for 20 years and of all the sub-types that exist, I have not witnessed such distress and intense shame as those with POCD.
I recall working with a father of four who was also a primary school teacher and out of the blue he started having intrusive thoughts in relation to being a paedophile. He was terrified, even though he had never had any intentions or desires in relation to children. He became so afraid that it was affecting his ability to do his job and he only came to therapy with myself as he was about to quit his job. This is the extent of fear that can arise.
For people who struggle with the thoughts alone, without being able to speak about it, or attend therapy, their mood may well be affected. In addition to the symptoms of OCD, by the time they get to therapy, depression may have taken hold as they lack the buffers that can protect us from low mood as many people with this type of OCD isolate themselves from other due to the intense fear and shame and guilt.
Another client I worked with was overwhelmed with shame and this shame prevented her from getting help for many years. It was only after reading an article on POCD that she began to think in terms of OCD as opposed the the horrifying thought of paedpohplia and got the courage to seek professional help. This client like so many others, experience loneliness and isolation, as not only can they not speak of their suffering, many people avoid contact with others.
Cognitive Impact
- Obsessive Thoughts and Rumination:
- Example: Lisa, a retail worker, spends hours each day obsessing over whether she might be a paedophile. These thoughts dominate her mind, making it hard for her to focus on her job or enjoy her hobbies. She constantly replays interactions in her head, looking for signs that she might be dangerous, which only increases her anxiety.
- Difficulty Concentrating:
- Example: Tom, an accountant, finds it increasingly difficult to concentrate at work because his mind is always preoccupied with intrusive thoughts. He worries about every interaction he has with children, including his nieces and nephews, making it hard to focus on his tasks and leading to mistakes in his work.
- Distorted Self-Perception:
- Example: Rachel, a fitness instructor, starts to see herself as a bad person because of her intrusive thoughts. She knows logically that these thoughts are just a symptom of POCD, but emotionally, she feels like they define her. This negative self-view affects her confidence and self-esteem, making it hard for her to feel good about herself.
The Impact on Relationships
In my experience working as a psychologist, it is in relationships and parenting that people with POCD suffer the most. I have worked with people who wanted to start a family but did not, as they were too afraid about having children due to the nature of their thoughts. It is very important to understand that even those these thoughts feel very real, they are only thoughts, having them does not mean you will act on them.
The fear of being around children can create a sense of dread and anxiety, making it difficult to engage in normal parenting activities, for example, one young mother I worked with closed her eyes when she had to bath her children as she was so afraid of looking at them inappropriately. This type of fear can lead to avoidance behaviours, which can impact the parent-child relationship, for example, not going to their child’s sporting activities due to the fear of how they might act in changing rooms.
Even friendships with other parents cant be impacted. Most young mothers rely on and enjoy the friendship of other young mothers and this friendship is made at mother toddler groups, or taking young children to school. For the young mum with POCD, she may avoid those activities, indeed I recall one client I worked with, could not go the school gates as she thought the other mothers knew something was wrong, even though in reality she was an excellent loving mother.
Getting help
Seeking professional help is crucial for managing POCD. Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a primary treatment that will help you understand and change your thought patterns and behaviours. The first stages of CBT are what we call psychoeducational, where you are taught all about the model of therapy, but also taught all about the condition. If you want to learn more about how CBT can help people with POCD, I recommend starting with this article.
Having POCD explained to you by a professional who does not show any shame or disgust in relation to the condition can bring such relief. I am thinking of one particular client I worked with many years ago, and hearing POCD explained in terms of OCD, that is, in terms of something happening to her, almost brought a flight into heal. CBT helps sufferers challenge their intrusive thoughts and develop healthier ways of thinking. A specific technique within CBT, called Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), involves gradually exposing the person to the source of their anxiety without engaging in compulsive behaviours, which helps reduce the anxiety over time. This method allows individuals to face their fears and reduce the power of intrusive thoughts.
Conclusion
Living with POCD can be incredibly challenging due to the intense psychological burden it places on sufferers. If you are not yet ready for therapy, read the material on my website. All psychoeducational material will be helpful. Once you can see that you are suffering from a type of OCD, then you might feel comfortable enough to attend for therapy.
